Love Hurts (Forever and Always #17) Page 4

  I knew it was immature but I couldn’t help it. “Can I ask you something personal?”

  “Sure.”

  “Did you sleep with a bunch of women after you broke up or before?”

  “After.”

  “Why?”

  He shrugged. “I’d been with one girl my whole life and I didn’t want to be in another serious relationship. I just wanted to have fun and enjoy being single, not being tied down to anyone. But when I saw you, all of that went out the window.”

  “Why? Why am I special?”

  “Honestly, I have no idea why. I can’t answer that. All I know is I wanted you the moment I saw you, and as soon as you opened that pretty mouth of yours, that attitude and all those smartass comments coming out, I didn’t want you to close it. I wanted to know more about you until the point of obsession. That’s the moment I knew you were special.”

  “But all I did was argue with you.”

  “Exactly.” He held my gaze. “Other girls just say what they think I want to hear. They try to be as compatible and easy going as possible so I’ll stick around. They don’t challenge me or call me out on my shit. But you do.”

  Now I felt stupid for being so insecure about the whole thing. I wasn’t sure why Flynn loved me or why he was so loyal to me, but he clearly was. My doubts and fears wouldn’t change that. I couldn’t deny what was right in front of my face. “I’m sorry.”

  He rolled his eyes. “Until next time…”

  That stung.

  He caught the look. “But I will walk you through it every time until you finally realize how in love I am with you.” He moved away from me then pulled on his clothes. “What do you want for dinner?”

  “Actually, I have plans with Cortland.”

  “What are you guys doing?”

  “Dinner.”

  “Why don’t you just invite him here?” he asked.

  I shrugged. “I didn’t want to bring company to your place and bother you.”

  He sprung onto the bed and tackled me. “Our place. Say it with me now. Our place.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Our place.”

  “Now invite him over. You can have company over whenever you want. You don’t have to ask my permission.”

  “Okay.”

  He gave me a firm look. “If you say it again, I’m going to smack you.”

  “Then maybe I’ll say it on purpose,” I said playfully.

  His hand moved to my ass and squeezed. “Don’t tempt me.”

  I turned over and gave him a good view.

  “I will bite it.”

  “Oooh…”

  His eyes darkened. “I’m going to get you good tonight before bed.”

  “I look forward to it.” I left the room and turned on the shower, not bothering to pick up my clothes off our bed or remake our sheets. Because this was my place too.

  When Cortland came over, he brought a bottle of wine. “A belated housewarming gift.”

  I took it and smiled. “Thank you.”

  He hugged me then pulled away quickly. “Where’s Flynn?”

  “In the shower. He’ll be out in a second.”

  “How’s it going with him?”

  “I love living with him.” I took a deep breath and felt the happiness course through my body. “It’s wonderful.”

  “Is it because of him or because there’s no cockroaches?” he teased.

  “I think both.”

  “Good answer.”

  “It’s just nice sleeping with him every night. Even little things like watching TV before bed are great. I don’t know how to explain it. I never get tired of it, even when we bicker and argue.”

  Cortland had a sad look on his face.

  I realized how stupid I was. “I’m so sorry…”

  “No.” He changed his face quickly. “It’s okay. Don’t worry about me.”

  I knew he was depressed about Monnique, and my perfect relationship wasn’t helping. I needed to change the subject. “Hungry?”

  “For anything but pizza.”

  I smiled. “That’s all we’ve been eating lately, huh?”

  “I took a different route here just to avoid the pizza place we usually go to.”

  I laughed. “Now that’s just ridiculous.”

  Flynn came down the hallway. He was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, but his hair was messy and still damp. He never did anything to his hair but he still looked sexy, somehow. Well, he looked sexy no matter what.

  Flynn approached him. “Hey.”

  Cortland extended his hand. “How’s your nose?”

  “Fine.”

  “I’m sorry about that. I overreacted…”

  “Just a smidge,” Flynn said like a smile.

  “I apologize.”

  “It’s cool,” Flynn said. “I know you were looking out for Hazel, and I can never be upset about that.”

  “Thanks,” Cortland said.

  They moved to the table and I set the plates and dishes on the surface. We were having crusted parmesan chicken and spaghetti.

  Cortland took a bite. “This is good. I haven’t had a home cooked meal in a long time.”

  That made me sad. I knew his breakup with Monnique was killing him. “You could learn how to cook yourself,” I jabbed. I hoped humor would make him feel better.

  “I’m good with computers, not kitchen appliances,” Cortland said.

  “Build a computer to make your own food,” Flynn said. “Like a really hot robot servant.”

  “That would be cool.” Cortland’s eyes lit up. “But that project would take a year. Just learning how to cook would probably be a more efficient use of my time.”

  “Good point,” Flynn said. He devoured half his plate. “Baby, this is good.”

  “Thanks,” I said with a smile. He usually complimented my cooking every night. I wasn’t used to cooking for two. Normally, I avoided eating in my apartment because of all the critters, but his apartment was clean and open. It was such a nice change. And he had a laundry unit inside the apartment. That was the coolest thing of all.

  “How’s everything going?” I asked. I’m sure my meaning was implied.

  Cortland shrugged while he ate. “I’ve been better.”

  “Any more dates?” Flynn asked.

  “No,” Cortland said.

  “How’d it go with Kacey?”

  “Good,” Cortland said. “She was really cool. And smokin’ hot.”

  “And you aren’t going to see her again?” Flynn asked incredulously.

  “No,” Cortland said sadly. “Dating just reminds me how much I love Monnique. I’m not getting anywhere with it. Kacey wanted to have sex with me and I couldn’t go through with it.”

  Flynn looked at me like I was crazy. “Man, you got it bad.”

  “I wish I didn’t,” Cortland said sadly.

  “So…what’s going on?” Hazel asked.

  “What do you mean?” Cortland asked.

  “With you and Monnique?”

  “We’re just friends.” He finished his plate then put it aside.

  “But you’ve been spending time with her…” I couldn’t believe spending time together was healthy.

  “I can’t stay away,” he said simply. “I want to take her back but…I’m afraid she’ll hurt me again. I couldn’t take it if she did.”

  I’d never seen Cortland this depressed. I wish there was something I could do.

  “Maybe you should go on a vacation or something,” Flynn said. “Just take a break.”

  “So I can sit on a beach and think about Monnique all day?” he said bitterly. He pounded his fist on the table. “God, I hate this. I wish I didn’t love her as much as I do. I fucking sucks.”

  Flynn and I shared a look across the table but didn’t speak. I placed my hand on Cortland’s back and rubbed him gently. “I think you deserve someone better.”

  “You and everyone else,” he whispered.

  “Then what are you going to do?” I asked. “You
can’t stay this way forever.”

  “No, I can’t,” Cortland said. “Do you know how hard it is to move on when there’s only one person you want? Even after everything she did, I still want her. I still love her. Why?”

  Flynn gave him a sad look. “Because she’s the one, man.”

  “If she was the one why did she hurt me?” Cortland snapped.

  “Love hurts,” Flynn said. “It’s not always perfect. It’s hard work. When you read books and watch movies, you only see the couple fall in love and get their happily ever after. But they never show all the work and heartache past that point. Just like everything else, love is constantly work. And honestly, no one is perfect. We all fuck up from time to time. When Hazel and I fought a few weeks ago, I was a total ass. But she forgave me because she loves me.”

  “So, you’re saying it’s okay to hurt those you love,” Cortland spat.

  “No,” Flynn said. “Not at all. But like I said, no one is perfect. Everyone fucks up. If you really think Monnique is sorry and has changed, then give her another chance. If she does hurt you again, then you’ll know without a doubt that you need to move on. But if you give her another chance and she’s learned the error of her ways…you could have everything you’ve ever wanted.”

  Cortland leaned back in his chair and said nothing. His fork was still in his hand but he didn’t touch his food. Silence stretched.

  I hated seeing Cortland in pain. He was such a wonderful guy and didn’t deserve any heartache. My experience with Monnique wasn’t necessarily a positive one, but if he loved her there had to be a reason why. I rested my hand on his and rubbed his knuckles. It wasn’t much, but it was better than nothing.

  “We’re here for you,” Flynn said. “Our door is always open.”

  “I know,” Cortland said quietly. “I appreciate that.”

  “And we love you,” I said.

  He smirked slightly. “I know that too.”

  4

  Flynn

  After Zahara and I broke up, I didn’t want to be in a relationship ever again. I loved her and wanted her for the rest of my life, but the way we drifted apart made me realize love wasn’t as strong as I initially thought. She was okay with being apart from me. That wasn’t normal.

  So, I got laid a lot. It was fun, light-hearted, and easy. I met a lot of really cool girls that could make me laugh without trying. I met supermodels and girls who loved sports. I’d been around, and I never regretted that journey I took. I was determined to be a bachelor for the rest of my life. Since it was too hard to tell if women were with me for my money or status, I just avoided it altogether. Never once did I think there was a single girl in the world who could completely change my way of thinking.

  But there was. She had green eyes, blonde hair, and curves that could kill.

  I still remember the way she flashed me a look of disgust in that auditorium. Her disdain for me caught my attention. I usually got looks of lust and longing, not hatred. And the fact I was her boss surprised me even more. I’d already thought she was attractive, but then I became desperate to talk to her.

  And when I did, I wasn’t prepared for the personality that came out of her mouth. Like a line caught in the water, I was hooked. She had no idea who I was. She had no idea I was rich. And she called me a cocky asshole right to my face.

  I know it’s unorthodox, but that’s how I found her, the girl that could make me settle down. Monogamy was back on my list, and I kept my hands to myself. Shit, I even kept my eyes to myself. This girl was pure gold and diamonds. And she was mine.

  I didn’t like girls who were damaged or had a bunch of emotional problems. I steered away from that shit. I didn’t have the patience or compassion to give a shit. But Hazel…she was different. When she told me why she was pushing me away, I actually cared. When she told me how much her ex hurt her, it hurt me. And that just told me what I already knew—that I loved her. That I fell in love with her within the first month of dating her.

  I thought that would scare me but it didn’t. It just inspired me to keep working my ass off to get her to trust me. I wasn’t known for my monogamy, but if I was in a committed relationship, my heart and soul were in it. I’ve never cheated in my life. If I wanted to get laid by someone else, I’d just end the relationship. But that wasn’t going to happen with Hazel.

  This may be too early to tell, but I was pretty sure I found my future wife. I didn’t miss my old bachelor life and I didn’t miss all the parties and the girls. Staying home with her and watching her read a book was all the entertainment I needed.

  The things I loved most about her were her biggest flaws. She was stubborn, like, ridiculously stubborn. She wouldn’t ask for help if her life depended on it. But that made me feel loved when she finally accepted my help. And I liked how strong she was. Even though her life was rough, she never complained. She bottled it inside and kept her chin up.

  Her fear of cockroaches was an anomaly. When Vanessa bullied her, she didn’t take the bullshit. She stood up for herself even though she only weighed a hundred pounds. But when a tiny cockroach made a home in her bathroom, she was running and screaming.

  Her lack of confidence didn’t bother me. I liked women who knew exactly what they were worth, but I enjoyed building her self-esteem. I knew she was sexually inexperienced, and I didn’t mind teaching her all the ropes. But it still baffled me how she viewed herself. She had no idea she was beautiful. She thought her tits were too small and her body was ordinary. God, she couldn’t be more wrong. I didn’t like fake women with big plastic tits and hardly ate anything. I liked real women. I liked Hazel.

  Since she completely turned my life around literally overnight, I knew she was the one. After our first conversation, I stopped sleeping around and focused on her. The night we got pizza, one of my regulars hit me up for a booty call. And I said no. At that point, Hazel was the only girl I wanted. And that was a huge testament to my obsession with her.

  She still didn’t trust my love for her, but I knew that would change. I’d spend the rest of my life erasing everything Kyle did. He may be her past, but I was her present and her future. And I wouldn’t disappoint her.

  I left work early because I had a meeting with the producer from HBO, Carly. She came by the apartment a few weeks ago and picked up my manuscript. I wondered how she would feel about it. Maybe she hated it. Maybe she liked it. I guess I’d find out.

  We met at a diner in Soho. Hazel was still at rehearsal. They were in the middle of practice so I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye. But I texted her and told her where I was. I tried to be conscious about everything I did. I always covered my ass and told her where I was going and who I was with so she would never worry about me. But she never asked me anything. I knew she was trying to prove she trusted me as much as I was trying to prove I was trustworthy. It was odd, but at least we were both working hard on the relationship.

  Carly was already in the booth when I arrived. When I sat down, I saw the manuscript on the table. Judging all the red writing, I knew she tore it to shreds. I tried not to let it impact my ego. Never in my life had I submitted a script that was flawless.

  “Hey,” I said. “Thanks for meeting me.”

  “I asked you, if I recall correctly.”

  “Yes, you did.” I ordered a coffee because I was sluggish from the long day. She already had one in front of her. “So?”

  “So?” She smiled. “I didn’t realize you had a girlfriend.”

  What? What did that have to do with anything? “We’ve been together for a few months.”

  “Oh.” She nodded. “Last time I checked, you were hot on the market.”

  Again, what did this have to do with anything? I’d make a smartass comment but pissing her off would get me nowhere. “I guess those days are over.”

  “You guess?” She studied my face.

  “I mean, they are.” What did she want me to say?

  “And this relationship is serious?” She kept looking at
me.

  Was she hitting on me? “I love her and we’re living together. Yes, we’re serious.” That should fix the problem.

  “I see…” She placed her hand on the manuscript. “I admit I’m a little disappointed. But now I understand why you didn’t ask me out.”

  And I thought I was cocky. “I only have eyes for her.”

  She raised an eyebrow. “Well, if you ever get bored with that, let me know.”

  If she weren’t my entrance to HBO, I’d leave. But I couldn’t. I held my tongue and didn’t react.

  “So, I liked it—mostly.”

  “What would you like me to change?”

  “It’s spread into ten episodes. We prefer thirteen or more—for advertisement reasons.”

  “You mean because you make more money.”

  She shrugged. “Call it what you will.”

  “I think I can do that.”

  “We’ll film the first three episodes and air them. If they bomb, we won’t contract the rest of the series. If they succeed, we’ll discuss the contract.”

  What? “Wait. Are you picking up my script?”

  She smirked. “What do you think?”

  I smiled. “I guess I’m just surprised.”

  “You’re very talented, Flynn.” She flipped through the pages. “It needs some work, but I’m sure you can take care of it.”

  “I’ll get on that when I get home.”

  She rested her arms on the table. “We should meet up again and go over it—at my place.”

  I’d hit on enough women to know when they wanted to sleep with me. “How about my place?”

  Disappointment flooded her face. “No.”

  Why was this happening to me? What do I do? “We can discuss it over the phone. That makes it convenient for both of us.”

  “Let me make this clear.” Her voice was suddenly cold. “I’m the person sticking out their neck to get your work in. You better give me what I want and do as I ask. Or forget everything.”

  That stung. Now it made me question everything. “So, you don’t think my work is really that great?”