Time Stands Still (Forever and Ever #51) Page 13

There was a knock at the front door before it opened. Cayson walked inside wearing a collared shirt and slacks. He just got off work after a long day. When he realized I wasn’t home he knew this was where I would be. “Hey, Sean. How are you feeling?”

  “Great,” Dad answered. “Thanks for asking.”

  Cayson’s eyes moved to Cedric first. I used to be the person he was most excited to see when he came home, but I was quickly replaced.

  Not that I minded.

  “Having fun with Grandpa?” Cayson kneeled down and picked up our son. He cradled him to his chest with a single arm before he took the seat beside me. “Hey, baby.” He gave me a quick kiss on the lips before he turned back to Cedric.

  “Hey,” I said. “How was work?”

  “It was alright,” Cayson answered. “Just a bunch of paperwork today.”

  Mom came into the room with a tray of snacks. She usually served meals nonstop when we came to visit. Dinner just ended an hour ago but she had something else to feed us. Despite the fact my dad was a picky eater she still whipped up stuff for everyone—but I was the only one who ate most of it. “Honey, do you need anything else?” She came behind him and rubbed his shoulder.

  He patted her on the hand. “Baby, I’m good. Sit down and relax.”

  She continued to massage him. “I am relaxed.”

  Cayson tickled Cedric’s belly before he turned back to me. “Ready to head home?”

  I preferred staying with my parents. When there were more people in the room, I felt safe. But I knew Cayson wanted dinner and some alone time. He loved my parents—but he loved spending time with his wife and child more. “Sure.”

  ***

  Another nightmare came to me that night.

  And it was the worst one I’ve ever had.

  I sat up in bed covered in cold sweat. My heartbeat was kicked into overdrive and I couldn’t steady my breathing. I felt sick—really sick. When I looked over at Cayson he was fast asleep. The covers were bunched around his waist, showing his strong physique under the limited light from the bedroom window.

  I was surprised I didn’t wake him up.

  I had to keep moving. I couldn’t lay in that bed and hope I’d go back to sleep. I didn’t even want to fall asleep and return to the land of nightmares. I pulled on Cayson’s sweatpants before I walked into Cedric’s room.

  He was sleeping in his cradle, his eyes closed his and his little hands opened and relax. The blanket was tucked around him and the light from the baby monitor glowed from the nearby table.

  I pulled up the chair and stared through the bars into his crib. Without knowing I was there or having a care in the world, he slept soundly. He didn’t remember the closet was hid inside because he was too young to understand what was going on.

  But I would never forget.

  I remembered sitting in the darkness and listening for every single sound. I remembered the sound of the gunshot and crying to myself as I held Cayson’s son. That was worse than any nightmare I experienced—only it was real.

  I looked out the window just to be sure no one was on our property. I didn’t see any cars or people. It was completely silent with solitude. I returned to the chair and stared at Cedric. He came into a world that wasn’t safe. Now I understood why my father worked so hard to protect me. He didn’t want me to understand how the real world worked. He wanted me to live in my bliss of naivety.

  The floorboards creaked as the sound of footsteps approached. My heart rate picked up but my mind remained steady. Logic kicked in and I knew the visitor could only be one person.

  Cayson stepped inside only wearing his boxers. His hair was messy and his eyes were heavy with lost sleep. He stared at me in the chair then came closer, his arms thick by his sides and his chest wide and powerful. The black ink on his arm contrasted against his fair skin. “Everything alright?”

  “I just wanted to check on Cedric…” I looked into the crib and stared at our sleeping son.

  “He seems fine. Let’s go back to bed.”

  “I want to stay a while.”

  Cayson eyed me quietly, knowing something was wrong. “Talk to me.”

  “I just…I don’t want to leave him alone.” Cayson and I hadn’t talked about that god-awful night. It was something neither one of us were prepared to discuss. He could have died that night. Cedric and I could have too.

  He sat in the other chair by the crib and leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees. He stared at the floor for several heartbeats before he looked me in the eye. His look was comforting but also intimidating. “No one is going to hurt us, Skye. We’re safe.”

  “I know…” Would I ever be able to shake this feeling? “My father said the same thing.”

  “We have an alarm system. And no one has any intention of hurting us. We have no enemies.”

  “I don’t know if that’s true. As long as my family is wealthy we’ll always be a target.”

  “That’s not true. I know you’re really shaken up about everything, and it’s completely understandable. But no one is after us anymore. They never really were after us. And those guys are dead. There’s no one to be afraid of.”

  I nodded slightly.

  “And I would never let anything happen to you or Cedric.” He held my gaze as he spoke. “I would never let anyone touch my family. They’d die before even getting a look at either one of you. So go to bed and rest easy.”

  My hands found each other in my lap. “I was so scared, Cayson. I wouldn’t know what to do without you…” Tears came to the surface, heavy and thick. They fell down my cheeks and streaked to my lips.

  “Baby…” Cayson moved to the floor in front of me and grabbed my hands. “Nothing happened to me. Nothing will ever happen to me. Okay?”

  “I thought I might lose you. I thought Cedric would never know his father.” I tried not to sob so Cedric wouldn’t wake up but I couldn’t keep the emotion back. All my fears left my lips.

  “Never gonna happen.” He squeezed my hands. “I’m not going anywhere. Not now and not ever. We both need to forget about that night and move on with our lives. We were lucky nothing happened. Now let’s be happy.”

  I knew he was right but I couldn’t control myself.

  “I killed one of those men and I feel no remorse.” His words remained quiet but they shook the room with their power. “That’s not like me. I can’t hurt anyone to save my own life. But when it happened…I didn’t think twice about it.”

  I looked into his eyes and saw his sincerity.

  “I don’t feel bad because it was the right thing to do. My family was hiding upstairs and I had to keep them safe. I did what I had to do. And I’ll never feel bad about that. I keep waiting for the nightmares and the guilt…but they haven’t shown up.”

  “Because you have no reason to feel guilty…”

  “I know,” he whispered. “I can sleep at night because I know I protected my family. I can sleep at night because I know they’re never coming back. Sean killed Shot and all of his men. There’s no one left to torture us.”

  I squeezed his hands in return.

  “Everything will be alright, Skye.” He pulled my hands to his lips and placed a gentle kiss on my thumbs. “Once you believe that, it’ll get easier.”

  I stared at the beautiful man kneeled before me, and I couldn’t understand how I got so lucky to end up with a man like him. There was no one better. He was the kind of man every woman would kill to have. “I’m so lucky I have you…”

  He stared into my eyes with affection. His lips softened at the words and he pressed another kiss to my hands. “I’m the lucky one, Skye Preston.” He moved closer to me and cupped my face before he gave me a soft kiss. “We’re going to have another baby to complete our family. And then we’re going to live happily ever after.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Slade

  I just left the building where I had my meeting with Don Murray. The album was a success and hit the top 100. I’m not even sur
e how that happened. I was nobody just a few days ago—but now I was somebody.

  Oddly enough, I didn’t feel what I thought I would feel. I thought I would scream from the tallest building or do cartwheels right through traffic but I didn’t do any of those things.

  I was more excited about Olympia.

  She would be here very soon, just a few short weeks. Trinity was getting bigger in her pregnancy, and she was about to pop. A record and guest appearances just didn’t seem that important anymore.

  Was that how I was supposed to feel?

  I walked into the apartment at one in the afternoon, long before Trinity would get home from work. I had another album to write and I already had a few tunes in my head. They were mainly about impending fatherhood, and I knew I should get down the lyrics before they left my brain.

  When I walked inside I wasn’t alone. Trinity was already there. She stood in the kitchen with a cake on the counter. A gift sat on the counter and a banner hung from the ceiling that read CONGRATULATIONS.

  Confused, I stared blankly. “Shit, is it your birthday?” Did I forget? Or was it an anniversary? Did I just fuck everything up at the most magical times of our lives?

  She chuckled. “My birthday is in November—and you knew that.”

  My heart finally slowed down. “Then what’s the cake for?”

  “You, silly.” She turned the cake so I could read it. It had a picture of a guitar on the front and it said YOU’RE A ROCKSTAR. “I just looked at the top 100. I knew you would make it.”

  She checked? “I…I don’t know what to say.” Instead of feeling happy or proud I was just embarrassed. I always lived in Trinity’s shadow. She was far more beautiful, smart, and successful than I would ever be. Getting this kind of attention was heartwarming.

  She cupped my face before she gave me a hug. “I’m so proud of you.” Her arm snaked around my waist and she gripped me tightly. She turned to her side so her belly wouldn’t bump into me.

  My arms hung limply at my sides before I returned the embrace. I was numb—but in a good way. My arms moved around her shoulders, and I felt her soft hair under my fingertips. “Thank you.”

  “You worked so hard, Slade. You deserve it.” When she pulled away she gave me a kiss.

  “Well…thanks.”

  “Look what I bought today.” She grabbed the CD from the counter and showed it to me. My face was on the cover along with the album title. The plastic wrapped had been removed. “I was the first in line at Target.”

  My heart fluttered. “You’ve already heard all my songs.”

  “But I wanted to be the first one to buy your album. Because I’m your biggest fan.”

  Those words sent a high of feelings inside me. A stadium full of fans could never make me feel the way Trinity made me feel. She sent me all the way to the moon. She did crazy things to my heart and the rest of my body. “That was sweet.”

  She hugged me again with her face pressed into my chest. “I knew you were destined for greatness.

  Trinity always believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself. Despite my short attention span and lack of motivation, she always said I was worth something. “You’re too good to me, baby.”

  She pulled away and set the CD on the counter. “How about some cake?”

  “Hell yeah.” Anytime there was cake, I was down. I wrapped my arm around her waist and gave her a smile. I could probably have a party with all my friends, but it was nice just celebrating with just Trinity and Olympia. I used to live in the fast lane and spend every weekend partying and hooking up with strangers. But now there was something more enjoyable than spending the night in with my family.

  Nothing at all.

  She sliced the cake and handed me a piece. Her own plate had a tiny sliver because she couldn’t eat much sugar. It was bad for the baby. We stood at the counter and ate it together.

  “What’s in the box?” I nodded to the gift-wrap on the table.

  “You want to open it?”

  “Duh. Who doesn’t love gifts?” I ripped open the paper then opened the box.

  “Well, it’s not actually for you,” Trinity said. “But I did make it for you.”

  When I looked inside the box I saw the tiny onesie at the bottom. It was solid black with my album cover on the front. In words was written, “My Daddy is a rock star.” The words were on the top and the album picture on the bottom. I stared at it without feeling anything. I was void of all emotion. But it was just the calm before the storm, the wind before the hurricane, the snow before the ice. “Trinity…” I felt the material in my hands and noticed the tears that formed in my eyes. Emotion sprang out of nowhere when I pictured my little girl wearing this. I imagined Trinity and Olympia backstage at my concerts. I pictured teaching her to play guitar and how to make music.

  Trinity’s eyes watered when she watched my expression. “I thought you would like it.”

  “I…I love it.” I took a deep breath to still the moisture that gripped me by the throat. I didn’t expect any of this when I came home. And I certainly didn’t expect this. “It’s the best gift I’ve ever been given.”

  She smiled at me through her tears.

  I stared at the shirt for another moment before I placed it in the box.

  “She’ll look so cute in that.”

  “She will.” She wasn’t even here yet but I felt like I knew her.

  She stared into my face. “I knew this day would come.”

  “What day?” I asked.

  “When you would be a father.”

  “But she’s not here yet.”

  She grabbed my hand and placed it on her stomach. The life thudded deep inside her, the pulse of a second heartbeat. “We both know that’s not true.”

  ***

  I walked past Cayson’s secretary and entered his office like I owned the place. She was on the phone so all she could do was throw her hand around and silently command me to wait.

  I shut the door behind me and entered the large room. It had floor-to-ceiling windows, bookcases on either side, and a desk that rivaled Sean’s. Cayson was on the phone, and his eyes followed me as I sat in the chair facing his desk. He was talking about antibiotics…test tubes…or something like that.

  Cayson finally hung up the phone. “What’s up?”

  “Nothing. What’s up with you?”

  “I’m working,” he said sarcastically. “What else would I be doing at ten in the morning on a Wednesday?”

  “Like you don’t watch porn all day behind your desk.”

  Cayson rolled his eyes. “You caught me.”

  I leaned back into the cushioned seat and grew comfortable. His office had a dark tint to it and it smelled like pinecones. Anytime I was in there I wanted to fall asleep.

  Cayson watched me for a moment and waited for me to stay something. When I remained silent, he spoke. “What brings you here?”

  “Can’t a guy want to see his best bud for no reason at all?”

  “Of course,” Cayson said. “But not as his job in the middle of the day. Do you want to go to lunch?” He eyed his watch. “Even though it’s not even ten thirty…”

  “Nah. I’m not hungry.”

  Cayson raised an eyebrow and stared at me like I was a bomb about to go off in the middle of his office. “Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine, dude. Just not hungry.”

  “But you’re always hungry.”

  I shrugged in response.

  Cayson leaned forward over his desk, his elbows resting on the surface. “Everything alright, man?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I saw your album made it to the top 100. Congrats.”

  “Thanks.” I thought I would feel more excited about it but I wasn’t.

  Now Cayson became more concerned. “Talk to me.”

  “When I came home yesterday Trinity had a little surprise for me, to celebrate the album’s success. She had a cake and a gift. Inside the gift was this onesie…” I rubbed my thumb and forefing
er together like I could still feel the fabric. “And it said ‘my daddy is a rock star’ across the front…”

  He remained quiet until he was certain I was done speaking. “That sounds nice.”

  “It was…really nice.”

  “Then what’s the problem, Slade?”

  “It’s really hitting me that I’m going to be a father.” I knew I was going to be a dad when Trinity became pregnant in the first place. It wasn’t a new revelation. But now I felt differently about it. Olympia was almost here. Soon, she would be a tiny person in my hands. “There’s going to be a real person who looks up to me. There’s going to be a person who needs me. To this day, I still ask my parents for help. I go to my dad for advice all the time. It’s such a big responsibility and it doesn’t end when they become an adult. It never ends, you know?”

  “Yeah, I know,” Cayson said quietly. “But it’s a good thing. My parents love being with Clementine and I every chance they get. If we could move back in they’d probably love it. There will be some tough moments, Slade. But there will be a lot of great moments.”

  “Yeah, I know. I just feel like my life is over.”

  Both of Cayson’s eyebrows shot up.

  “I don’t mean in a bad way,” I said quickly. “I just mean…I’m not young anymore. I’m an adult now. I have to take care of both Trinity and Olympia. I’ll never go to another party and get wasted off my ass. I’ll never do anything crazy again because I have a family to think about. It’s just hitting me how different my life is. It changed so quickly I didn’t even see it coming. I don’t even remember how I used to be…”

  “I do,” Cayson said gently. “And you’re exactly the same.”

  That was ridiculous. I was the most selfish jerk on the planet. “No, I’m not.”

  “I think so. But Trinity has heightened your qualities. She brings out the best in you.”

  My heart ached in response. “Thanks, man.”

  “No problem. Now stop thinking like this and be happy.”

  “I am happy,” I said. “But it’s the kind of happy that makes you sad.”

  Cayson cocked his head when he didn’t understand what I meant.

  “You know, when you’re so grateful your life turned out the way it did. Every time I try to appreciate it I can’t. It’s just too difficult. It’s too much for my brain to process. If Trinity hadn’t straightened me out, no one would have. I’d be some single guy living on the road, screwing anything that moved. I would never know this kind of happiness…it could have easily turned out differently.”